fm THE LONGROOFFAN

A MAN IN A FLORIDA SUPERMARKET TRIES TO BUY HALF A HEAD OF LETTUCE.

THE VERY YOUNG PRODUCE ASSISTANT TELLS HIM THAT THEY SELL ONLY WHOLE HEADS OF LETTUCE. THE MAN PERSISTS AND ASKS TO SEE THE MANAGER.
THE BOY SAYS HE'LL ASK HIS MANAGER ABOUT IT. WALKING INTO THE BACK ROOM,
THE BOY SAID TO HIS MANAGER, 'SOME ASSHOLE WANTS TO BUY HALF A HEAD OF LETTUCE.'
AS HE FINISHED HIS SENTENCE, HE TURNED TO FIND THE MAN STANDING RIGHT BEHIND HIM, SO HE ADDED, 'AND THIS GENTLEMAN HAS KINDLY OFFERED TO BUY THE OTHER HALF.'
THE MANAGER APPROVED THE DEAL, AND THE MAN WENT ON HIS WAY. LATER THE MANAGER SAID TO THE BOY,
'I WAS IMPRESSED WITH THE WAY YOU GOT YOURSELF OUT OF THAT SITUATION EARLIER. WE LIKE PEOPLE WHO THINK ON THEIR FEET HERE.

WHERE ARE YOU FROM, SON?' '
GREEN BAY , WISCONSIN , SIR,' THE BOY REPLIED. '

WELL, WHY DID YOU LEAVE GREEN BAY?' THE MANAGER ASKED.

THE BOY SAID, 'SIR, THERE'S NOTHING BUT WHORES AND FOOTBALL PLAYERS UP THERE.'
'REALLY?' SAID THE MANAGER. 'MY WIFE IS FROM GREENBAY.'

'NO SHIT?' REPLIED THE BOY. 'WHAT POSITION DID SHE PLAY ?'